Helping hand in finding peace

Posted on Fri 9th Nov, 2012 @ 7:55am by Lieutenant Colonel Cara Karikkar & Lieutenant Colonel Tallus Karikkar

1,864 words; about a 9 minute read

Mission: http://sb109.sim-station.net/index.php/sim/missions/id/2

It had been a trying week and Cara was struggling to find her center. Even though her mind was telling her that Brian was like Dev and a pack member her system was so stressed that she was almost feral and there was only one person on the station that she trusted enough to help her with her problem ... hence standing outside Tallus' door.

Knocking she started to wonder if it was a good idea after all.

Tallus was meditating when the knock came. Reaching out his mind he detected that it was Cara and she was more stressed then he had seen her. ~You may enter Cara.~ Tallus said through his mind as the doors opened.

Walking in to the room Cara looked round as she fidgetted not sure how to ask for the help. "I ... " She stuttered and took a breath to try agaoin but no words came out. Trying mentally she sent ~I think I need help Tallus ... and ... I dont know what you will do if I let you see WHY I need help.~

~I suggest that the best way to see what I will do is to just show me. I am still Vulcan, I am still impartial. I may not seem like it most times but I do have a soul.~ Tallus said still meditating.

Sighing she sat down opposite him with a nod and closed her eyes trying to find a calm place in order to send her memories starting with what had happened to her when she graduated from the academy and was experimented on through to how her system was reacting to Brian more as a pack mate than a mate. She didnt try to hide anything ... even the relationship they had had for a short time but she did blush hoping Tallus didnt think she was easy or a slut.

~A most efficient way of communicating. Telepath's are always more truthful. Nothing can be hidden from each other.~ Tallus said. ~And you should not fear judgement. Those that tell the truth need not be judged.~

Nodding she relaxed a little ~Its damn near impossible to lie this way ... I cant find my calm place at the moment ... even when they were experimenting on me and changing me I always had a calm place ... Now all i feel is constantly hunted and under threat ... Hell I even nearly went after Samantha, Brian's mate.~

~There is no safer place then in these quarters. That you should know. This base as well. It is safe.~ Tallus said. ~Would you allow me to share some of my meditation with you. It may just help.~

~Cant hurt ... cant promise to sit still for long ... I tend to get restless ... In my head I know it is safe ... and that my pack is safe ... but my subconscious keeps bringing up the fact that Kale got away and that he is a threat ... hell if im honest the only thing keeping the crew safe right now is that I see you all as pack in one way or another.~ She hid her face in her hands ~What the HELL did they do to me Tallus?~ She didnt mean physically and augmentation wise but rather why she was reacting this way.

"Major, come sit across from me." Tallus said switching to verbal talking. "I want you to close your eyes and try to remember your best memory." Tallus said closing his eyes again.

Moving across to sit opposite him she matched his position and closed her eyes trying to think of a best memory. Taking a deep breath in and letting it out slowly she drifted back to the day she and Dev had found Jessie and the other children.

~Excellent.~ Tallus said delving into the memory with her. ~Let everything else escape out of you mind except this moment. This is now.~

Breathing slowly she focused on the sights and sounds and smells of that day and tried to push everything else away. Remembering the feel of Jessie's small body against hers in a hug she smiled and felt something in her relax a fraction.

~Now think of your worst possible memory.~ Tallus said sharing in the memories.

Her breath speeding up as she last herself in the experiments she shuddered and tried to wake herself up ~I can't .... ~ Her heart rate sped up and she began to hyperventillate as something stared at her in the dark parts she hid from.

~Relax. This is a memory. Nothing can hurt you. I am here.~ Tallus said as light started coming into the scene. ~I am a guardian. In order to defeat this memory you have to think past it.~ Tallus said keeping his control over the scenario.

She hid in a corner of her memory of this day shaking ~It hurts ....~ She tried to look at the memory without the emotion and could see several doctors standing around her body and injecting various viruses to target parts of her DNA ~Why? I dont understand why they did it ... what did they want to achieve?~ She could remember hearing voices back then but hadnt been able to focus on them with the pain.

Trusting Tallus enough to know hw wouldnt let her get hurt she made herself watch and listen ~They were trying to create something ... but what and what did I have that others didnt?~

*********Flashback scene with current time talking as well*********

Listening to the beeping of the heart monitor the head doctor who only introduced himself as Alpha looked down on their current victim with a smile "Ah Cara dear ... you are going to be our pride and joy ... and maybe one day the mother of a whole new race of beings."

Cara pulled at the bindings trying to find a way to free herself and only making the damage to her wrists and ankles worse. Heaving once she spat in his face before dropping back to the bed "Go to hell asshole."

Instead of backhanding her the way one of her guards had he ran a gentle hand down her cheek "Cara, cara, cara ... you are unique ... not even the school fleeter's will be able to deny it. Once you are fully aware of your abilities there is no one in the known worlds who could stop you. You hold now inside you the key to destroying worlds and having them rise anew in your image. You will be a god among men."

Having only words to protect her she looked at him and said "Whatever dumbass ... why would I want to rule worlds ... its got to be pretty boring."

*Cara froze the recall and looked at Tallus ~What do they mean?~ *

Tallus closed the images. His head hurt severely. "I do not know. But this is something that needs meditation. There is something that I do not like about it." Tallus said shaking his head. "If too much information is loaded into your memory then you could become brain dead. But do not fear, I can help you to find inner peace."

"Is that why I feel out of control? The memories are coming back?"

"It could very well be why. It will take severe meditation to get to that point though. And I am willing to assist you." Tallus said.

Nodding she winced and held her head as it began to pound in time with his "Maybe once this headache goes?"Her eyes were having trouble focusing and the exhaustion was catching up.

"Indeed." Tallus said nodding. 'Computer play selection Karikkar 3 9 Beta.' Tallus ordered the computer as soothing music was played. Within a couple seconds the headaches were fading.

Untensing slowly she looked at him in curiosity "How does that work?"

"The melody helps to soothe ones aches. It helps after a hard days training. My great grandfather composed it himself." Tallus said listening. 'Computer cease music.' "Too long and non-Vulcan's become unconscious."

She chuckled softly "That could be bad unless you don't mind me camped out on your sofa."

"I would have to feel sorry for you." Tallus said with a smile. "I have a very uncomfortable sofa."

She grinned at that "You'd definitely owe me one." She teased gently. She couldn't help asking curiously "Are you bonded?"

"Once long ago I was. My wife died in child birth." Tallus said somberly.

Nodding she said softly "My condolences for your loss.

"It was a long time ago." Tallus said nodding.

Nodding again she asked in curiosity "You've never rebonded?"

"I have never found the right person." Tallus said.

'What sort of person have you been looking for?"

"That would be the question. I am not entirely sure. I guess that I will know when I find them." Tallus said.

She nodded and she relaxed back against the couch she was leaning against. "How have you coped with ..." She left it hanging not wanting to come right out and say it.

"I am a Vulcan. While I do display my emotions I do know how to suppress them." Tallus said grinning.

She coughed as she tried not grin back as his grin was infectious "yeah but ... you know ... 7 years is longest most have coped without going doolally."

"I may be a Vulcan but I am more skilled then most. Unlike other Vulcan's I am able to suppress my...urge. For the past 20 years it has worked well." Tallus said.

She blinked "Seriously? .... 20 years?"

"Indeed. I've only been bonded once." Tallus said nodding.

"Wow ... but ... nothing for 20 years?" She was trying to get her mind around it.

"When a child is born they go a very long time without it. I myself went 25 years. I can surely do it again." Tallus said smiling.

"Why would you want to?" She wasn't trying to be rude she was more surprised and a little confused.

"It was not a choice. I am waiting for my bonding." Tallus said understandably.

She nodded "Didn't want it to be just anyone ... how do you now if ... you know?"

"I will be able to tell. Advanced telepathy remember." Tallus said smiling.

She blushed "Sorry ... I know its kinda personal ... its just... " She shrugged unable to say what she was trying to say.

"If I am to help you solve the problems you are facing then we are both going to be learning plenty of personal stuff." Tallus said thinking.

Nodding she sighed and tried again before getting frustrated ~I cant word it right!~ She sent the frustration and other she emotions she was feeling instead and hoped he didn't laugh or freak.

~I understand.~ Tallus said receiving the thought. ~We will work through each of these if you want. I will help you in any ways that I possibly can.~

Swallowing she nodded ~Why wont it let me just tell you?~

~Relax.~ Tallus said softly. 'Computer play selection Karikkar 3 8 Beta.' Tallus said as the music began to play. ~This will clear your head.~

Curling up with her chin on her knees she watched him as she nodded and just breathed, her eyes closing as she calmed enough to doze.

MAJ Tallus Karikkar
Marine Commander & Second Officer
Protector

Major Cara Treia
XO
Protector

 

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