Secrets Inside of Secrets

Posted on Mon 9th Jan, 2017 @ 1:16am by Commander Paul Graves PsyD & Lieutenant JG Kellian Michaels
Edited on on Mon 11th Dec, 2017 @ 12:31am

965 words; about a 5 minute read

Mission: Wrongs Darker Than Death Or Night
Location: Chief Counselor's Office, Deck 83
Timeline: After the 'Silent Night' departs
Tags: kellianmichaels, paulgraves

Kellian Michaels followed Yeoman Matav, who paused in front of the door labeled Paul Graves, PsyD. Kellian let out the tension in his shoulders. No nervousness in front of this guy. I've met him before; he doesn't bite. This won't be a problem, he told himself as Matav pressed the chime before he could lose his nerve.

"Come in."

The crisp, faintly accented voice invited them in from behind the door, and Yeoman Matav stepped forward, causing the door to hiss open. "Lt. Michaels to see you, sir," the young Argelian woman said.

"Thank you, Deosha," Graves said as Matav nodded and withdrew. Graves stood and came from around the desk. "Michaels, come on in. Good to see you when we're not having to investigate a murder or several."

"Yeah, it was alarming after the second one happened," Kellian said.

Kellian had never been in Graves' office before, but it looked like a typical Counselor's office anywhere, a little larger than would have been found on a starship. The walls were a warm beige and the furniture upholstery rust-colored. Graves had one of the typical Federation-issue officer's desks that was trimmed with fake wood and had a black dura-plas work surface. Graves gestured for Kellian to sit at the desk, in front of which were two guest chairs. A sofa was situated against one wall. Apparently the guy liked waterfalls, judging by the oil paintings that were hung. He shook hands with Graves and took the offered seat.

"Would you like tea, water, something to drink?" Graves asked. Kellian replied that an iced Coke would be fine. Graves got it for him and a glass of water for himself and then sat down at the desk. "So, what can I do for you, Lieutenant?"

"Didn't she tell you?" Kellian asked. "The lady asked when I made the appointment."

"I always prefer to hear it directly from the patient," Paul said. "Sometimes things change between the scheduling and the appointment itself. I never like to presume."

"Oh." Kellian shrugged. "It's just the usual 30-day required check-in visit."

"You made it by the skin of your teeth," Paul told him with a nod.

Kellian suppressed a wince. "The weekly reminder emails were getting annoying."

Paul chuckled. "I'm sure they were. Well, Lieutenant, this is pretty much a visit to see how you're adjusting to your new post and to your new status as an officer--I see you are fresh out of Officer Candidate School and served as a petty officer on a couple of postings before this--on the Vigilant and Courageous How is it going for you? Being an officer is quite a change from being enlisted."

"After the initial excitement wore off, yes, it's taken some getting used to," Kellian said, relaxing. "Back in Basic, the saying always used to be, 'Don't call me 'Sir;' I work for a living.' Now I'm the 'Sir.' I like the work, though, and I like the people I work with. We've all got a sense of shared mission. Solving this last case was, well, satisfying but also sad."

"I can understand that," Paul said. "It is tragic when someone with an abusive personality so frustrates others that it drives them to murder."

Kellian nodded. "I worry about them, especially Ms. Tinselle. What is she going to do? With Kringle dead and unlikely to have made any provision for her..." He shook his head. "It's a mess, all of it."

"Yes, it is." Paul typed something into his computer. "You seemed anxious when you came in here," he remarked. "Is something bothering you?"

Kellian grimaced. "Nothing I can talk honestly about, Dr. Graves."

Paul studied him. "Is it anything you can talk around? Or perhaps talk dishonestly about?"

"What?!" Kellian shot him a wary glance at the word 'dishonestly.' "I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say."

"You said you're troubled by something you cannot discuss honestly. You're a criminal investigations officer, Mr. Michaels, so I can well understand that there might be subjects you aren't at liberty to discuss with me but which might affect your work performance if they continue to trouble you. Can you, er...tell all the truth but tell it slant, as the poem suggests?"

Emotions swirled up in him--a spark of wild hope, immediate negation of it, resignation. "Unfortunately, it doesn't have anything to do with my job."

"Yes, I'm aware of that," Graves said. "You are completely comfortable discussing your work--happy, even. But this sadness that I'm sensing? It's not helping you. And it won't go away as long as you keep it locked in."

"I can't be honest with you about it," Kellian said between gritted teeth. "Please stop asking."

"Yes, you can," Graves answered. "All you have to do is lie to me."

"That doesn't even make any sense!" Kellian retorted.

"I won't know what the truth is, but I will know what the truth is not," Graves told him. "It might help you. You could at least talk about it then."

Kellian glared at him. "I went through all this the regular way when I was a kid. I thought I had worked through it all--that's what they told me! Now it's back in my head again. Why?" Abruptly, Kellian realized that he had the Counselor's complete attention. The man was peering intently at him.

"I don't know, Lieutenant," Graves said carefully. "Now, tell me a lie."

"You are crazy--Fine!" Kellian squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. "My mother died in a car wreck when I was ten. It happened right in front of me."

Graves was looking at him, shocked. "I see."

And, Kellian thought, perhaps the man did.

 

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