A Fear of Night, Part 1
Posted on Fri 15th Jan, 2021 @ 8:01am by Purulence Addams & Elizabeth Anderson M.D.
1,616 words; about a 8 minute read
Mission:
Denouement
Location: Brown Sector, Dr. Anderson's Office
Moksha Andivari paused at the door of Anderson & Graves Counseling. Below the names were the office hours, listed in Federation Standard dating format. Below them was a small inscription: "Walk-ins Welcome." Moksha opened the door and peered inside. The lobby was empty at the moment, save for a red-haired woman she recognized who sat behind a counter. Moksha entered, shut the door behind her, and then went to the counter, where the Bajoran woman with short, coppery-colored hair and a bright smile looked up at Moksha. "Good afternoon, Mother Moksha. How can I help you?"
"Rivda, I didn't know you worked here. I would like to make an appointment to speak with one of the counselors," Moksha said.
"I step in whenever I can, Mother. Dr. Graves isn't in today, but Dr. Anderson is available. In fact, I think she's free right now, if you'd like to wait while I check?"
"That would be acceptable. Thank you." Moksha went to sit in one of the chairs as Sek Rivda stood and went into the back.
Rivda knocked on Elizabeth Anderson's door. "Dr. Anderson? I've got a walk-in for you. Can you see her?"
Elizabeth put down the Psychology Today magazine she'd been reading. It was more than 400 years out of date, and a computer printed version at that, but she did enjoy holding her reading material now and then, especially if the subject matter was ancient. She never wasted a moment's thought on what her choice of reading material said about her, especially since people don't really change as much as they'd like to think they do. Many times, she came across something that gave her pause to think and apply it to one client or another.
"Is it someone you know?" she asked, curiosity evident in her tone.
Rivda nodded. "Yes. It's Mother Moksha. I don't remember what world she's from, but I know she's a priestess in it. She lives in the Midnight section and is well regarded. I'm not sure why she's here. She's never struck me as the sort who would need your services, but I guess we all need counseling at one time or another."
"Show her in and all questions will be answered," the counselor said, standing. Mother Moksha, she thought, scanning through her Starfleet databases at high speed ... and finding nothing. Like Alice said, 'Curiouser and curiouser.' "
"Right away," Rivda said and went back out to open the lobby door. "Come on in, Mother. Dr. Anderson can see you now."
The woman Rivda introduced as Mother Moksha Andivari was shorter than Elizabeth in height. She looked to be about sixty or seventy in Earth years. Her complexion was a pale lavender lined with faint wrinkles. Her hair had gone completely white, and it was covered by a veil that somewhat resembled a Spanish mantilla made out of sheer blue fabric edged in large silver and gold sunburst designs. She glanced about Elizabeth's office with lively interest, taking in the details as Rivda spoke.
"Dr. Anderson, this is Mother Moksha Andivari. Mother Moksha, Dr. Elizabeth Anderson."
"I'm pleased to meet you, Dr. Anderson," Moksha said with a nod.
"Please, have a seat," Elizabeth said, motioning to the comfortable chairs and sofa against one wall. As she came around her desk toward the woman, she held out her hand to shake. "If you're not a person who chooses to touch another, please don't feel obligated to shake my hand." She studied the woman across from her faster than most people would have expected, and found her pleasing in appearance, and as calm on the inside as she seemed on the outside.
"Ah. I'm not a telepath; I don't mind," Moksha said and shook Elizabeth's hand. "Thank you for seeing me. I've come to discuss my granddaughter, Teshara." She seated herself on the chair with a businesslike demeanor.
Moksha took a moment to compose her thoughts before speaking. "I think Teshara needs counseling or mindhealing, but her mother never would allow me to broach the subject when Teshara was a child. She was high-strung then. Now Teshara is an adult. I and my son's family are the only relations she has left, and the situation cannot continue. She needs treatment, but I don't know how to persuade her to come here, and I am--I am losing patience," Moksha admitted.
"I feel terrible about that, but she is so fearful of everyone. I have to distract her so I can leave our home to run errands. I try to meditate at home, and I cannot, because she won't be still; she is forever checking the doors and windows. She never seems to sleep. I cannot imagine that she is happy, feeling so anxious all the time. Can you help?"
"Let me learn a little more before I make a decision on that," Dr. Anderson said kindly, sitting on the edge of her chair. "When you say high-strung, do you mean she suffers from extreme anxiety? Was there a trauma in Teshara's childhood, something that caused a permanent fear? It isn't often that someone is born with a condition such as you describe."
Moksha thought about it. "I'm trying to remember. I think it started soon after Teshara's first experience of Night." Moksha paused. "Our world might not be familiar to you; we hadn't been members of the Federation long when we had to leave our homeworld. Tavaka is--was--a system of five stars. The only time our world ever knew true Night was when all the suns would be on the opposite side of the planet, which happens--happened--about once every five of our years. It's one sleep-cycle of startling beauty, something to be cherished--but in our religion, Night is the domain of the Adversary of the Gods of Light.
"Teshara was born just after the previous Night ended, so she was very well aspected. We all expected great things of her. And then, suddenly--" Moksha shook her head. "I hadn't made the connection before; my daughter's family didn't live nearby, so I didn't get to see them often. But yes, the first time I saw Teshara after her fifth birthday, she was a mess, and she has been like that ever since. She didn't want to leave home when Tavaka C was tearing itself apart. Her own mother refused to leave, and I was terrified I'd lose them both. I begged Teshara to leave home with me, and to my great surprise, she did. I was so thankful to at least be able to save one of them, but--that meant saving her illness, too."
Quickly accessing any Starfleet data on the destruction of Tavaka C, Elizabeth determined the information was meager at best. She could consult Damion later to see if he knew anything more. "Ah, so we have the Night. Then we have the destruction of the homeworld. How much of that did Teshara experience personally, or view on reports?" she asked. "And how far apart were the two events, one of which separated her from her mother, as well, it seems."
"She was about five when her first Night happened. She's lived through three. We left home when Teshara was about 18, and we've lived here for two years," Moksha said. "Our world still exists, but it is barely viable now; there's been so much radiation. My daughter and son-in law, Avra and Lamik, are still alive, but they've moved underground with the rest of the surviving faithful, and they're not allowed to communicate much, to conserve power. We used to speak with them weekly; now it's once or twice a month."
Elizabeth nodded, mulling over how much biological lifeforms are influenced by early life experiences, and how later events can reinforce those things. "I think I have the beginnings of an understanding of her issues. Now tell me what kind of outcome you hope we'll achieve. I also need to understand your expectations, what kind of life you envision for Teshara. I don't believe I can help her be the woman she would have been without any of these influences, but we can improve her life."
Moksha thought a moment. "Teshara was very much indoctrinated by her parents and our religion. I would like her to achieve a state where she could look at reality more rationally. I think that would help her to conquer her fear--if she could learn to understand that Night is actually the natural state of things in most of the universe and that it isn't evil; it's simply the absence of a sun. And that suns are not goodness; they are merely sources of light and heat. They aren't even deities, only representations of them. We had five suns in our sky; we named five deities after them." Moksha frowned. "But even that isn't really how I hope you'll be able to help her; I could teach Teshara the science myself, if she would listen. What I would like for you to do, if you can--what I have been unable to do--is help her learn to be the woman the Five graced her to be. Someone with friends, interests, a desire to explore a little, to laugh, to find love. To have a future and to find work that is pleasing to her."
Moksha gave Elizabeth a wry look. "I don't ask for much, do I? Of everything I said in all that rambling, what are you realistically able to do, Dr. Anderson?"
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