All the Best Adventures...

Posted on Wed 30th Oct, 2019 @ 9:57pm by Purulence Addams & Ignatius Collins & Mary Elizabeth Gregory
Edited on on Fri 1st Nov, 2019 @ 8:39pm

1,174 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: A Diplomatic Affair
Location: The Hangman's Noose Tavern, Deck 650
Timeline: MD-4, 1700 hours

A Federation starbase out in the middle of nowhere was a bizarre place to find a traditional English-style pub, Purulence Addams thought as she promenaded through the Promenade Decks with Ignatius Collins. After being turned down flat when he'd offered her his arm upon meeting her at Chlamydia's home, he'd walked quite contentedly beside her from Deck 1554, up the turbolift and tram, and now out on Deck 650.

Purulence glanced at the shops as they passed but studiously avoided gazing in any windows for too long. She liked saving her money and knew herself to be disastrously impulsive if she didn't sternly rein in the urge to dart over and look at this or that gorgeous tunic or lovely bauble.

On the other hand, she thought, that might get rid of the guy.

Except she so didn't want to. Walking beside him filled her with a sense of rightness that she couldn't explain. Walking arm in arm with him felt even more right, which was why she'd refused to do it, even though everything else in her said Yes!

"The Hangman's Noose Tavern and Inn," Purulence said aloud, reading the sign. "The name sounds promising."

"The owner tells me the one on Earth was originally called The Devil's Due," Ignatius said. "The story's interesting. Maybe you can get her to tell it to you."

"Maybe, but not tonight," Purulence said. The idea of some other woman horning in on her dinner date with Ignatius raised hackles. Why she should mind when she had no claim on Ignatius and didn't know the pub owner, Purulence had no idea.

"More than time enough for it," Ignatius agreed. He opened the wooden door for her, and Purulence stepped in. She glanced about and blinked. "Well, this is different," she murmured to Ignatius.

The pub was paneled in dark wood, with booths lining the walls, tables in the middle, and tall stools at the bar. Along the back wall, where any proper Wild West movie saloon would boast a giant mirror, instead hung a large wooden sign bearing the message, "All the best adventures begin in a tavern!"

Despite herself, Purulence grinned. "I think I like this place already."

"I hoped you would," Ignatius said as he stepped inside behind her. "Hello, Menali," he said to the hostess, a tall, slender girl who came forward to greet them. "Table for two, please." He glanced at Purulence. "Unless you'd prefer a booth?"

She shook her head. "Table's fine."

"Hello Mr. Collins," the girl said with a brief smile. She turned to Purulence. "Welcome to The Hangman's Noose, Ma'am. Have you ever been here before?"

"No, tonight's my first time," Purulence replied, "though I don't think it will be my last."

"Excellent!" Menali said. "I'll seat you over here to the right. Gamers are over on the left."

"You have gaming? Those really are dice I hear?"

"Every Friday, Saturday, and sometimes Sunday night," Menali confirmed as she picked up a pair of menus and two rolls of utensils from the hostess' station and led them to a table. "We get retired gamers in during the week. Here's your table. Have a look at the menu, and your waiter will be along in a moment." With a graceful curtsey, Menali grinned and left.

"Okay, this is the only place we ever really have to eat at," Purulence said to Ignatius. "I never knew this was here!"

"So what kinds of characters do you like to play--Drow?" Ignatius asked.

Purulence made a face at him. "Very funny. And I'll bet you play dwarves, asteroid miner. Just for that, I ought to play a Drow, just to make your character's life miserable." She paused. "I'm guessing you do game, since you know what Drow are?"

"It annoyed my parents, so of course I started gaming." Ignatius pulled out a chair for her, and Purulence sat. "Then, when I started going out on long asteroid prospecting trips, I'd start up a game with the other members of my crew. I'd have started a game on the Crimson Assurance, but I didn't have any dice with me, and its replicator wasn't up to creating them--or maybe I wasn't." He sat down perpendicular to her "It had a very limited list of non-foodstuffs that it could make, and I'm not that good at replicator programming." Ignatius opened his menu. "And no, I don't play dwarves. I play scumbag mercenaries. I'm a great admirer of Sandor Clegane."

"Why am I not surprised?"

A young woman with curly, dark hair approached them. She wore an honest-to-God, lace-up bodice, chemise, and kirtle. "Good evening, and welcome to The Hangman's Noose," she said. She looked at Purulence. "I'm Mary Elizabeth Gregory, the owner. I know Mr. Collins, but Menali tells me you're new here. Have you had a chance to look over the menu?"

"I have," Purulence said. "I'd like the Toad in the Hole, a cup of lobster bisque with sherry, and a pint of Bass."

"And for you, sir?" Mary Elizabeth asked Ignatius.

"Shepherd's pie, broccoli cheese soup, and a black & tan. We might want dessert."

"I'll bring along a dessert menu and a pitcher of water for you," Mary Elizabeth said and went to the kitchen to get it.

"You eat lobster?" Ignatius asked, making a face.

"Lobster bisque soup with a swirl of sherry in it is the next best thing to heaven," Purulence informed him. "You should try the one they serve at Orchids & Jazz."

"Lobster to a Mainer is like tuna from a can," Ignatius replied. "I'd rather eat interesting food."

"And shepherd's pie constitutes interesting food to you?"

"Do you know how long it's been since I had a good, flaky pie crust? Seriously, I wish I could take the Noose's pastry chef away with me when I head back to Earth."

"Uh-huh. I find your seriousness in me dubious at best," Purulence said. "Honestly! Thrown over for a pastry chef!" She fell silent as the bartender brought their pints to the table along with the water.

"Well, for her pastry, at least," Ignatius said with a shrug. He took a long sip from his beer and sighed happily. "Do you go running every day, or something?"

"Every morning. Why?" Purulence asked.

"Because if this is the only place you want to eat, and it's certainly my favorite spot so far, we'll both be as big as a house if we're not careful. Might as well be proactive about it. Could I join you?"

Purulence eyed him. "I leave the house at five am and jog two miles through the park. If you're up for that, don't let me stop you. Meet at the house?"

"Two miles?" Ignatius winced. "I might need the bunny slopes."

Purulence glanced at the sign behind the bar and smiled. "Think of it as the start of a great adventure."

Maybe, she thought, this won't be so bad, after all.

 

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