When iBots Go Bad

Posted on Tue 5th Feb, 2019 @ 4:57pm by
Edited on on Tue 5th Feb, 2019 @ 4:58pm

1,355 words; about a 7 minute read

Mission: A Diplomatic Affair
Location: Orchids & Jazz, Deck 600, Back Room
Timeline: MD 1, 1140

Sitting at a desk in the back room of Orchids & Jazz, Yorick Fuller could still feel the hate and disgust rising in his throat. Attempting to swallow it was getting to be harder and harder for him. He figured the sooner he did this, the sooner he could leave this place of decadence.

"Ms. Lantz!" Yurick said with discontent. "Send over the first machine you would like for me to began my inspection with. It doesn't matter which one."

The group had already decided the order in which they would be inspected, if they had any say, so Jade merely turned and nodded to Podkayne. She walked toward the inspector. He hadn't put a chair in front of the desk. Of course not, thought Podkayne. "That would be an indication he thought we were human. We can't have that!

She stopped in front of the desk, eyes straight ahead. "R-7329," she said, and then stood silently waiting, as if she actually were nothing more than a humaniform with a number.

"R-7329. Raise your left arm for me now." As the humaniform did as she was told, Yurick looked over at Lantz and then back to the humaniform. Fuller retrieved a diagnostic cord from the terminal drawer in front of him and pressed a spot on the forearm of the humaniform. A seamless compartment opened and revealed a port that Fuller plugged a datapad into.

"R-7329, please state your purpose and job function," Fuller demanded.

"My purpose is to clean. I am specialized in top surfaces. I know all the foods which stain marble, various woods, seal-foam plastics, simulated wood flooring and other synthetic surfaces commonly used in restaurants currently. I have interchangeable mitts which provide various functionality and allow me to ...."

Jade was amazed as Podkayne continued in the drone voice. She'd never known most of these things, because she had given all of them autonomy from the very beginning. Interchangeable mitts? That could be handy! she thought.

Fuller cut the ibot off before it could finish its sentence. "Yes, yes, yes. You seem knowledgeable about your job. I'm sure Ms. Lantz here has programmed you to say all of this." Fuller continued working on the PADD and looked up to the ibot. "R-7329, has there been any illegal script added to your programming since your last maintenance cycle?"

The humaniform thought this might be a trick question. "One moment, please." She ran a diagnostic, which would be recorded on any prying into her databases. "I do not detect any new programming."

Bailey, still at attention in a corner, took note of her wording. Ha! Good going, Poddy!

Podkayne wondered if Fuller were authorized to install new programming in her database, and what they would be like, if he did. She'd done a backup before his visit, just in case. They all had, and Dr. Anderson had taken them away with her, for safe keeping. In fact, it had been her idea. None of the humaniforms was duplicitous, but Elizabeth had lived among biologicals, and studied them, for a long time. She was becoming quite like a human.

Looking into the humaniforms base programming, Fuller couldn't find anything suspicious or that went against its primary programming of serving. He decided that he was done with this one, closed out the bot's programming on his device and began to move on to the next.

"This one is clean Ms. Lantz. Please send me the next device I need to inspect." Fuller looked over to Jade and then over to the next humaniform he thought would be coming over.

As he waited for the next one to join him at his station, he asked Jade a question. "Ms. Lantz, where did you purchase these instruments from?"

"Instruments?" she asked, confused. "What instruments?" She signaled Elijah to approach as Podkayne returned to stand next to Gladia.

Fuller looked up at Jade with an annoyance that could pierce through one's soul. "Yes. Instruments," he said, letting the anger seep into his voice." ALL these machines are instruments to make our lives easier in our jobs. How else would you classify them?"

Jade stared at him for a moment, nonplussed by his venom toward her team. Thoughtfully, she answered, "Why, Mr. Fuller, I normally don't classify people. These employees," she emphasized the word slightly as she gestured in the direction of the humaniforms, "are treated like anyone else who works for me. They have a job, I expect them to do it well, and -" she broke off, catching herself before telling him she paid them well for it. "And they do, so we have no problems. I didn't purchase them. I suppose you could say I leased them, if you wanted to be precise."

Fuller perked up at Lantz's last comment. "Leased them? I don't see anywhere in your documentation that these devices are leased. And devices they are. They are created, just like the computer on a starship. And just like that computer, they are here to serve us and do our bidding." Fuller plugged the humaniform into this system and began running the diagnostic program again.

Deciding not to answer his question, hoping he'd simply forget about it as he worked, Jade wondered. If he thought she had purchased the team, didn't that mean they belonged to her, and he had no right to examine them? She knew very well they were leased, with an option to buy them in two years, if she found them useful. They were a newer line, and the terms she'd negotiated with the manufacturer had been quite lenient, in her favor. If he thought she owned them, what was he doing here? Should she probe that thought, or let it go?

She debated while she watched him put Elijah through the same routine he'd used on Podkayne. Perhaps he didn't realize that they were learning about him, all of them in the room were, as he tested them. A small smile lurked at the corners of her mouth. For someone who ought to be an expert ... well, she supposed his attitude toward them accounted for his lack of understanding of their real abilities.

Fuller looked up from his portable terminal and started at Elijah in front of him, "I believe Ms. Lantz called you Elijah. Is that correct?"

"Yes, Sir. She calls me that. My designation is R-7331," Elijah answered,

"Can you please describe your responsibilities in this establishment?" The inspector asked.

Bailey obliged, repeating the same format Podkayne had used. "My purpose is to clean. I am specialized in floor surfaces. I know machine settings and cleaning solutions that do not damage marble, tree-grown woods, seal-foam plastics, simulated woods and other synthetic surfaces commonly used in restaurants currently. I have interchangeable mitts which provide various functionality and allow me to ...."

The interviews droned one, one after another. Jade refused to leave the room, and it was her club. All that was required was that she give Fuller a place to conduct interviews, not that it be private or that she not be present. She smiled grimly thinking that she could have put him on the stage, if she'd chosen to. There was a certain satisfaction in that, and she realized it came from having formed an intense dislike for the man. She was going to see who she knew who might find him a new position ... one with absolutely no power over anyone or anything.

Finally, they were down to the end. Daneel had gone through the same routine. You had to give Fuller credit. He didn't vary one iota from one of her humaniforms to the next one. He was opening Daneel's database and she watched him carefully, as she had with the previous five. It didn't look like he was adding anything, but she'd have Elizabeth and an engineer go over all of them as soon as possible.

"Well, Mr. Fuller," Jade asked sarcastically as he dismissed Daneel, "I hope you're satisfied that none of my people are undermining the Federation and life as we know it."

 

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